Defining Success

The word means different things to different people. In the end, a successful life for most means more than accomplishments and possessions.

We all seem to want it. We all seem to seek it. Success seems to be the magic word for what we chase after, prepare for, choose, desire. It’s how we often define our lives. Money, fame, and power are often what we have been told make up success.

If we don’t get it, we’re consumed with envy of those who do. Some who feel they have lost this golden ring have mental breakdowns and mid-life crises, or get ill just thinking about it. Others give up and decide that success isn’t all that important; what is important is simply having a job and keeping food on the table.

Some, at the end of life, suddenly realize they blew it, and what they thought they had, they never had at all.

 

Worldview definitions

Americans tend to define success by money and what it can buy. We are known around the world as a materialistic country, always striving after things and defining success by the accoutrements, such as snazzy cars, the size of our homes and designer clothes. And that’s just what we get – more things. That doesn’t mean more fulfillment or contributing to make the world better in some way. It simply means more things.

Other countries define success in terms of whether their work supports their family life. If they enjoy their work and it enables them to spend time with their family and have a balanced life, they consider themselves successful.

For example, an Israeli screenwriter was asked if she had plans to come to Los Angeles to try to break into the Hollywood film industry. She replied, “Probably not, since I can’t imagine being that far away from my family.” For her, success would be getting her film made in Israel, without compromising her family life.

 

Success and effectiveness

For some, success is defined by effectiveness. The question is: Are they making things happen? Are they achieving project goals? Are they contributing in a way that adds value? Success for these people means the project becomes better from their participation. They see results and feel fulfilled, but also know their work fulfills others, because the product they make is useful, or the service they provide is helpful.

 

Success and joy

Some define success by whether their job suits them, and by how much joy they feel when they work, the joy they feel when they finish, and the joy others feel as a result. If their work doesn’t add to their own and others’ happiness and joy, then no matter how much money they earn or how many accolades they receive, they don’t feel successful.

This joy comes not only from their own work but also from collaboration with others who bring skills to the venture and harmony to the work relationship. Nobody wants to work among discord. For many, if work relationships aren’t fulfilling and harmonious, they don’t feel good about their work, themselves or others.

 

Success and balance

Some define success by a sense of balance between work and the rest of their lives. For them, work is not what success is about: life needs balance, and work is not the only thing. John Woolman, an early American abolitionist, cut back on his successful work as a tailor because he wanted to be “free of cumber.”

When his work was getting so cumbersome that it left him no time for other things of value, he did not consider himself successful. If a job demands all of our time, precluding physical exercise, time with family and friends, and time for spiritual growth, then the balance is off and we might consider life unsuccessful. This can lead to a frenetic lifestyle, as well as illness, family problems, and loss of values.

 

Making a difference

Ultimately, many define success by how their lives will be summed up at their funeral. Will attendees talk about how much money the person made? Or will they talk about the person’s contributions and how blessed they feel to have known him or her as a friend and co-worker? For most, success is ultimately defined by the good one has contributed, and by what others remember. Has the person made a difference? C

 

About The Author

Dr. Linda Seger is the author of The Better Way to Win: Connecting Not Competing for Success, and Spiritual Steps on the Road to Success: Gaining the Goal Without Losing Your Soul. She can be contacted through her websites, www.lindaseger.com and www.spiritual-steps.com.



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